Category: Rants

Train Woes

Okay so once again the train is delayed and this means I will miss a connection, I get really dis-chuffed when that occurs. Then I will blame privatisation. But this isn’t a random blame.

Privatisation was supposed to bring us:

Lower Fares. It didn’t.
More trains. It didn’t.
Better service. Debateable, more customer service bollocks that’s for sure.
Increased efficiency – well let’s look at that.

How do we measure efficiency. Ask the operators and they may say number of people to destnation – in shortest time – on time. Ask the travellers and they would add a qualifier, they would put comfort while traveling as part of that.

Let’s face it, 150 mph in a boxcar with us jammed in like sardines would be efficient.

So comfort is a part of efficiency to the customer. Not just speed and on time, but do I get a seat, is there enough baggage space, etc.

Baggage Space, well that’s a joke, most trains have inadequate space and they now have no baggage car so there is luggage everywhere, especially airport trains which should have a baggage car, but that means an extra car, an extra person to manage it, loss of profit from fuel and personnel and time and oh gods that affects efficiency, so that’s a no go.

Seats. Even on regular routes with no issues there is often overcrowding and distressed persons, and this is compounded when there are delays that push extra people onto the trains. The solution is extra cars even if the figures do not justify it, but again this increases costs and yada yada yada.

So comfort is pandered to with a smiling smartly dressed staff member, who has no real power to alter anything, can only point at alternate routes, offer a form to make a complaint or request compensation or say sorry. There is no real method for change.

But this situation -could- be the same even if they weren’t private, I hear you cry…

Preston Station

Preston Station, so depressing not even a brightly coloured filter cheers it up.

Not the point, if they are making a profit at the massive expense of their customers there is an issue, and since we have no alternative that effectively is a monopoly, so I will complain and state that privatisation of the train industry was a joke that has led to nothing but a failure of promises.

There is an issue when we measure efficiency as a means test for quality, it isn’t. Efficiency is a test of just that. It never means quality of service, this thinking is applied to health, education and other large systems with the same failure. We want quality, we achieve that by measuring satisfaction of service, not by quantifiable metrics.

What a difference having power and a seat on a train makes to the mood of the weary traveller…so my argument about quality of service and amenities starts to gain more credence as my rage is ameliorated by the comfort i have found. I do however pity my fellow passengers who got on at Chorley and Bolton and are doomed to stand for the remainder of their journey, I doubt the delays and inconvenience are changing their moods at this present time.

Some of the trains are nicer though, so glad that we helped to pay for them with public funds!

Taxi(ng) to communicate

  • Rants
  • Saturday, 14 January 2012
  • 0

In the beginning…

I had a strange, well odd, well interesting, well probably something… experience in the taxi to the station. Let me set the scene for you and hopefully try to work this through as I do.

I was getting ready to fly to Orlando, part of this is that I was up earlier than usual (by about ninety minutes) but I hadn’t gone to bed any earlier, in fact due to a compression of things to do I went to bed later so I was already a little out of sorts and I had started on caffeine.

I called the taxi and set a time, the taxi was 20 minutes early and they didn’t call the phone as usual but knocked on the door which surprised me and I had a last minute panic rush to get ready – meanwhile the taxi driver had the clock running eventhough he was early. I can see his point as he was given the job by despatch, but that wasn’t my problem and I object to being charged for something that was out of my control, had they been a few minutes early I would have been ready, but 20 minutes is a bit too early. I only think about this now and I don’t believe it affected me at the time as I only figured out the increased cost when we got to the end of the journey.

The taxi driver himself was fairly chatty, he was either up early or more likely on the night shift so had been quiet for him until then. He was however a little critical of things, he had a strong Liverpool accent which was familiar to me and reminded me of when I used to live in Warrington.

A difference of perception/behaviour

We chatted about where I was going and he tried to up-sell me a taxi ride to the airport which felt a bit odd, he discovered I was going to a conference and then claimed I could just charge it to the company (not knowing I run the company). I mentioned that the company had already paid for the flight and hotel so cost frugality was to be respected. His words were that I should lie (to myself) and claim that there were no trains. Even if I were working for someone else that is not a wise behaviour especially as it is an easy thing to verify. One can also grab historical train delays if that is your lie of choice, so it is unwise even if your specific mores let it be ethical to engage in such behaviour. Especially if it is to yourself.

He asked about my line of work, I did my usual enquiry into his level of knowledge about computers and the computer industry, I didn’t wish to bore, patronise or confuse which is so easy to do. He reassured me it was good so I said we worked on “infrastructure” software as it was close to giving some idea. He wanted to know if it was like Apple, so I mumbled no and gave a simple explanation of Perl and OSS and left it at that.

Feeling odd and weird…

I felt odd during the conversation though, a little detached and not fully engaged. I usually pride myself on being able to talk to people and so it could have been the tiredness that was making me feel disconnected.

But I have had other occasions where I feel the same way, where I cannot connect as well as I have in the past. It is as if some of my register specific phatic communion skills are rusty. I find it hard to engage in small talk and need to be warmed to it, or rather I find it hard to engage in a specific type of small talk.

This could be the particular levels of socio-cultural groups and people I am engaging with and their standard forms of communication. Added to this is my increased use of text as a form of communication in online life such as irc, text message, email etcetera. This is perhaps dictating a particular social interactive model and providing the impetus for my interactive passivity and failure.

Finding reasons…going forward…

In all honesty the introduction of a child into my life has probably added to this in many regards, further dictating modes of thinking and interaction. It is very easy to fall into the trap of all ‘parent talk’ about things that affect your child social age group and future. To discussing their development and the particular habits you engage with them. There are fascinations based upon these and I think a good number of parents follow them. I wonder however if we can generalise and say all parents are like this?

Back to my social skills however and it will be interesting to see if I can practice and regain some of the inter-social dexterity I once felt I had. This will of course mean that I will once again have to try and talk to people more which fights against my natural shyness.

Yes I am shy. I hide it well by being an extrovert and consciously pushing communication, it is part of why I am loud, boisterous and gregarious, some of what makes me want and crave attention is to hide my brains immediate pull back and hide a little then they wont see you for what you really are…

Okay, too close to psychological triggers of behaviour there…

But I am shy, and I often feel I am being awkward and don’t know what to say or how to ask and continue talking, I can rant on and on about the minutiae of things that interest me, but have trouble getting people to want to continue talking to me…

More thinking required and examination needed…

Thanks for the time.

(I had no idea how to end this…)

…

Sorry for all the elisions…

Rude?

  • Rants
  • Friday, 13 January 2012
  • 0

So while flying to the US I encountered what I thought was a rude bloke, it could be me who is just too sensitive, or maybe with my attitude I am rude, here are my thoughts as I travelled.

–START RANT–

A bloke sat to the right of me on the flight has a loud cough, obviously it is irritating him, I just wish he’d cover his mouth more with his hand or with a handkerchief when he is hacking up a lung, or maybe just get it over with and die already.

So that was written three hours ago, since then he has munched on M&Ms with his mouth open and constantly coughed spraying germs liberally into the air, there is the occasional half-hearted effort to cover the mouth, but most of his loud and violent explosions are done unmasked. I have headphones on and listening to loud music and I still don’t drown him out, time to just kill him with the foldaway table I think.

Okay, 40 minutes later and he has a spare chair as the bloke who was sat next to him has moved, maybe to jump off the plane rather than be next to him, and so he has placed his feet up on the seat, that’s not a crime, leaving the shoes on however is just plain awful. I am not being prissy but there is something deeply wrong with shoes on furniture, I dislike it, take your fracking shoes off. Especially if they are boots, this just compounds a social sin.

I wonder if this piece will be used against me in court…

And as we land he takes off his belt while we taxi and turns on his phone to check his messages, please slam on the brakes so he flies face first into the seat back…

–END RANT–

I Get That

  • Rants
  • Wednesday, 4 January 2012
  • 0

<rant>

“Of course I know that there will be many people watching this who are worried about what else the year might bring. There are fears about jobs and paying the bills. The search for work has become difficult, particularly for young people. And rising prices have hit household budgets. I get that. ”

So said cameron as part of his new year address, and my response to this is bollocks.

He gets what it is like to come from a broken home with a mother who divorced twice.

He gets what it is like to come home to the house you were born in, that you were raised in, to see all that remains of your possessions strewn on the street because the baliffs have repossessed your house and most of what you own.

He gets what it is like to spend 30 months on the unemployment lines because you are inexperienced, too young and without a career or even a direction in life.

He gets what it is like to live on a ‘sink’ estate where the evening activites are alchohol, drugs, misplaced violence, arson and burgalry.

He gets what it is like to be hit in the face with an iron bar so that you are mugged having 12 pence in your pocket.

He gets what it is like to make the choice between having a low skilled job or placing yourself in debt for 17 years because you put yourself through full time education.

I experienced all of those during the reign of Margaret “Iron Lady (trickle-down neo-Liberalist POS)” Thatcher, and now I have to witness the same retarded policies, the same excuses, the same sick, twisted logic applied 30 years later.

He gets that. Because he has personally heard about things like that. Of course neither he, the arsonist also known as Clegg and the wealthy little suck-puppy Osbourne have never experienced any of these. They have in fact been spooned a rather indulgent life when compared to many of us, so the idea that the “get” anything about the personal experience of many people brought up during the previous Tory social destruction (80s), and that they know how hard it is for anyone in the UK currently suffering under their mismanagement of the country is ludicrous.

We are all in this together which is why top earners had a wage increase of 49% on average last year and the rest of us got thoroughly shafted by the coalition.

So, Mr Cameron, please stop saying you “get that”, you don’t fucking get it, you are unlikely to fucking get it and you sound like a complete twat when you attempt to emote with something that is alien to you. I will believe you, Clegg or Osbourne, if you all give up your lifestyles and live on a council estate on the minimum wage/benefits for 12 months. Do that and I think you might have some chance of getting it. Until then stop with the hypocritical bollocks.

</end rant>

Fake Alcohol

  • Rants
  • Saturday, 31 December 2011
  • 0

The BBC are warning us that there is a lot of fake booze for sale, particularly Vodka as it is easy to make clear spirits as that’s the normal colour of distilled drink. The issue it that you don’t end up with the right type of ethanol, you may get methyl-ethanol or meths/methanol – which is poisonous and potentially fatal as was highlighted by the recent issues in India.

The Beeb have a handy little guide to see if it is fake:

I’d like to add a couple of items to that. Such as:

Don’t buy it at a ridiculously low price;

Don’t buy it from a mate’s car;

Don’t drink if your mate is saying “try this I know the guy who makes it, it’s brilliant”;

Basically an ounce of common sense is all that’s actually needed in this regard, if you are at all unsure then avoid like the plague and drink something else.

 

Zingzillas lost their awesome

  • Rants
  • Saturday, 26 November 2011
  • 4

So having a small child changes you, for one thing you get to watch a lot more children’s television. Despite all your protestations that you will raise your child in a bubble of academic excellence and books only, you quickly start to use the excellent service that is CBeebies.

One of my favourite programs is ZingZillas,[1] but I have noticed an issue with this latest series, in fact they have taken what was a brilliant show and reduced it’s brilliance, they have taken the shine off and lost the awesome. Let me explain some of the changes.

  1. It is shorter and it shows as it feels very rushed.
  2.  Because it is shorter the coconuts drop quickly so no sense of build or narrative tension.
  3.  We have less story and virtually no character development or interaction which was a strength in the previous shows.
  4. The special guest performers are given less time and do not interact as much, they also have no place in the storyline.[2]
  5. The other characters, DJ, heads, chorus birds and Todd have virtually no place in the story, and less interaction with the main Zings;
  6.  They added dress elements:
    a. Zack has a cape that makes him look like a failed superhero;
    b. Pansy has been given a feather boa because you know she’s either a stripper or a drag queen;
    c. Tang has a cowboy hat that makes him look like he finally came out and just went full on camp;
    d. Drum has the only costume element that makes sense. She has some, in character to her, butterfly wings.

The last big element is that the Zings’ themselves know it has become less, they feel that they have lost their cool and brilliant selves, they no longer state at the end of each episode “that was the best big Zing ever”.

I want my best big Zing back, I want genius episodes like the Wishes episode whose story and song were awesome. I want the return of narrative tension, storyline and characters entwined within the development of the stories. I don’t blame the writers or the production crew at all, and the songs are still great, but it is too rushed, it needs to be able to breathe not be throttled.

Give our Zingzillas their awesome back, that’d be the best Zing ever.

—-

[1] Visit some of the ZingZillas sites:

[2] I am informed by the internet[3] that the actual ‘glade’ time and ‘performance’ time remains the same, and this I cannot question without examining two episodes, an old and a new. I am inclined to believe it remains the same but the ‘less interaction’ in the storyline, or less time spent developing the need for the guest performers to be there makes it feel as if they have less time.

[3] Specifically the creative force of Banks and Wag

Do what thou wilt…

  • Rants
  • Sunday, 7 August 2011
  • 0

(Caution this post contains personal opinion, emotional choice and casually rambling rhetoric, a shorter version can be found at http://mdk.per.ly/2011/08/07/do-what-thou-wilt/)

I was asked, online in Twitter(1) by a friend (@techpractical is their  twitter ident) if I would support their efforts to form a LGBT.pm. So a bit of knowledge for those of you who don’t understand what that is, LGBT stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual and Transsexual; .pm is shorthand for a Perl Mongers group as they use the domain identifier .pm.org for the groups these are usually regional groups who meet up to be part of their local technical community, hence london.pm.org and northwestengland.pm.org.

@techpractical had decided that Perl needed a specific group to represent these people, now as I mentioned above the .pm groups are traditionally regional matters but there are precedents for their being other types of groups as shown by the drinkers.pm and Dahut.pm groups amongst others.

I think that he was approaching me for a couple of reasons, I am the Managing Director of Shadowcat who are known for supporting the community and community efforts, I am the organiser and co-organiser of a number of conferences and events, I am the Chair for the Perl Foundation Marketing Committee, I am a Director and Secretary for the Enlightened Perl Organisation and I think I have a reputation for helping people to get things done and supporting other people’s efforts to improve the community for everyone.(4) There is also the fact that we know each other socially which might also be the only reason.(5) Of course the possibility exists that it is none of these reasons whatsoever or a subset of them that I haven’t considered.

My initial response via Twitter  (scroll to the end of the article for the tweets) was to clearly state that there were precedents for having groups that were not location based but based on identity or lifestyle so I had to support that. That is when I hit the usual ‘140 characters is not nearly long enough for a good response’ as it seemed a cold response. I sounded as if I supported a general concept based on the fact that there was historical bias. I wasn’t. I was trying to indicate that we had a good case for it in the first part and that identity based Monger groups already existed. The Perl community supports at least two identity based Monger groups to my knowledge (6). There is the infamous ‘drinkers.pm’ who meet at conferences and troll the bars after the event has finished, in this way they do become a geographical group when they meet but they are divergent otherwise. Then there is ‘Dahut.pm’ who organised the 2011 YAPC::NA conference and are comprised mostly of organisers. I could also mention that unlike most other groups my own northwestengland.pm covers a whole region and not just a city due to the diversity of locations we all reside in.

So in my very next tweet I mentioned that the subject needed support and that this would be a good way of showing the support for equality in our community. Now in my head I can run a lot of arguments for and against supporting such an issue and most of it is political or aimed at personal sensitivities, I am not entirely comfortable with listing them all as many of them are positions i have no favour for and wouldn’t promote them even in an abstract example for a sensible argument.

I can, however, make a very good case for equality and the representation of such that bears a simple and pragmatic understanding. I have always liked to think that no two people are equal, it is hard in my mind to make that assessment. I am not equal to my wife in looks, intelligence and general musical skills and she doesn’t have my arrogance, pedantry or strength (she also lacks my knowledge of Doctor Who)(7). Some of these distinctions are genetic, some are environmental, but they are still differences, they are what marks us all out as unique beings. This also mixes a qualitative argument with Sophistry on the nature of equals, can you define equal by matching elements of testable cogency, practical/physical examination and individual taste? However, and despite that cul-de-sac, we all have the right to be treated as equals and in regards to any organisation whether governmental or otherwise we should be afforded those same rights.

Though I should still relate that I have a concern that we might appear to be over politicising the Monger groups and a distributed community of interest is not the place to create communities and pseudo communities based on identity.(8) One could respond that it is impossible to remove identity from community and that we already share these things and it is why and how we form such close bonds. One could equally argue that this is just a feature of similar interest not identity or lifestyle choice which is arguably what this group would be(9). So we return to an over politicising stance, we are using the community to highlight, comment upon and correct, what can be seen as a broader societal problem.

However, I am not opposed to there being some political stance, this isn’t about posturing or forcing people to accept that stance it is about recognising it exists. We have a community that has members who clearly identify with this issue, some of us live in a society and mix in cultures that classifies these people with derogatory labels, reduces their rights and in some locales criminalises their behaviour.(11) If we are to allow people the right to form groups that have a similarity based upon the worship of that sweet nectar we call alcohol we have to allow groups that identify themselves with mythical beasts amongst other ways. It is progressive to be inclusive and not exclusive, it is also a natural evolution of a community, from a community of interest to one that shares identity and celebrates individuality and the choices of it’s members.

Now an anecdote and something I normally do not like to think about. I am going to wander towards my youth and a confession upon it. When I was younger I had my perceptions challenged and I realised a horrible truth about myself that I forced myself to change. I was presented in a social psychology class(12) with a video of two men kissing deeply on a high street and the narration casually declared that most people were uncomfortable viewing this image(13), I didn’t find that surprising as I knew I was uncomfortable seeing it at that point. It hadn’t really struck me before as I had never seen two men passionately kissing in a public place. I guess, to my lasting shame, that this was at that time a mild homophobia. A product of environment if we are kind, and in all respects thoroughly wrong. Like most apparent heterosexual men in the western world I was quite happy with two women kissing passionately as the stereotyped fascination was already thoroughly ingrained into me, but not two blokes kissing.

I felt ashamed on that day, and not mildly but deeply as I had always felt that I saw people for who they were and judged them on their deeds, not their sexuality or gender. I had friends who were gay and I realised they were never affectionate in public society as much as other people were, in fact they seemed to never be that affectionate when with friends. I discussed this class with them at the time and realised I was a moron, I had never looked at the expressions on other people’s faces when they walked hand in hand in a public place. Was I one of those people?

This was less than two decades ago. I decided then that I would ditch that attitude as that was not the person I wanted to be and I don’t believe it was the person my mother raised me to be. It wasn’t as easy a task as it should have been, I would love to tell you that my stance changed overnight, it didn’t, attitudes are hard to shift even if you don’t like them, but I did change. So I guess I emote these days with this argument, I don’t want to live in a world that has these attitudes built in to it. I don’t care if you choose to be a homophobe, I allow you that choice even if I think it is wrong. In fact, being the arrogant pedant I am I might even defend your right to be an arse. But, I do care that people are made into arses without being exposed to a world where that attitude is seen as a choice and hopefully an unpleasant one. So when asked to support lifestyle choice, and the freedom to express and to encourage participation based on identity then I have to support it.(14)

-mdk

 

Post Scriptum: The request was officially accepted and there is indeed now a LGBT.pm (http://www.pm.org/groups/757.html)

Original Tweets

(Reprinted here for reference)

Evening of the 20th Jun:
techpractical:
@shadowcat_mdk i think a lgbt.pm group might be good for perl. thoughts?
34 minutes ago

shadowcat_mdk:
@techpractical we have groups such as Dahut.pm and drinkers.pm, it is established that some groups are identity not location. I support it.
14 minutes ago in reply to techpractical

shadowcat_mdk:
@techpractical also, lgbt is a huge societal issue that needs to be embraced by all communities, damed right that we recognise/support this.
12 minutes ago in reply to techpractical

shadowcat_mdk:
@techpractical perfdave is very connected with these issues politically iirc, so I think we can conscript his support.
10 minutes ago in reply to techpractical

_doherty
@techpractical @shadowcat_mdk: Count me in.
10 minutes ago in reply to techpractical

Morning of the 21 Jun:
@techpractical:
@shadowcat_mdk he’s on here as @davepa ge_ld . I’m happy to set up up the group with your support

@shadowcat_mdk and if shadowcat could donate space for a website and mailist lists ,this would be even better 🙂

@shadowcat_mdk:
@techpractical would be honoured to provide space and a mailing list.

 

—
(1) It struck me at the time that Twitter timeline was such a public place to be asked and that my life has changed so rapidly with the continuing march of technology. There was a time when I would have never have started a discussion about what I may or may not support in a public forum, mostly because I wouldn’t have been in that forum being a naturally shy person(2), now it seems normal(3).

(2) I really am that shy, honest, I just don’t come across that way, partly because of my current life/work/social matrices and partly because shy people tend to be gregarious and loud to combat the shyness.

(3) There is probably a longer post somewhere about how much I have changed my opinion and how this has been affected by my exposure to technology.

(4) I know many people reading this know that list but I was trying to engage all readers, also you have to list the reasons people approach you rather than it just being a random conversation on Twitter between two people. I should also state that @techpratical is a well-known member of his local .pm group and a well respected coder and contributor to the community. He also is a cheerful and vocal campaigner for rights.

(5) If of course that was the only reason then I do apologise for the above self-grandising speculation.

(6) Thou the official bias is not recorded here as I am not sure who makes an ‘official’ decision on these matters, well I know of them but I cannot speak for them or any position they consider official.

(7) A tad modest but bears a lot of truth as well. I do consider my wife more intelligent than me in that she has an ability to structure her thoughts in a far more cogent fashion, I can construct a faster argument and pull from more diverse sources, but that is a matter of being wider read. She is more attractive, goes without saying there is photographic evidence to support this and she is musically talented, she plays the trumpet, the piano, has a beautiful singing voice and I sound like a goose farting in the fug and have yet to master the intricacies of the triangle.

(8) Computer languages, and in particular Per,l is our principal shared passion in the .pm groups but because of their nature they evolve and include other shared elements. So we have a “Community of Interest” that shares an over riding shared passion that has pseudo-communities and geographical relationships a s a distinct part of its make up, but we have also evolved true community and familial relationships from our interaction and from the natural evolution of a community. Covered a little more in my presentation “I <3 My Community”.

(9) Please note that I do not consider sexual orientation to be a “lifestyle choice” and evaluating it in that manner is facile and quite stunningly insulting. Choosing to like Star Trek, dress as Spock and attend conventions is a lifestyle choice, the complex dynamic of socio-cultural forces that shapes your sexuality (and I am ignoring genetics as that is a whole different and treacherous kettle of sharks) can not be reduced to a choice! “Oh darling, I am so bored with watching typically hetro TV shows, I am going to try my hand at being queer so that i might watch musicals and sing freely the greatest hits of Abba”(10).

(10) Gay gags of the 1980s reunited in the one location.

(11) It is for reasons like these that I find the need to be proactive and make action to overcome these actions.

(12) The class was part of an introductory module in my first year at university. I had never before then considered myself to hold any attitude towards/against gay people or anyone having a right to choose, I felt comfortable with my position as i had a gay uncle so that surely qualified me as being fine with the world as I never thought bad of him for his sexual orienation.

(13) This was in the days afore Brokeback and “gay cowboys eating pie”.

(14) Barring those whose lifestyle choice is to be a part of a group that removes the choices from others of course, old Wicca standard, “do what thou wilt, without harm”. But, seriously I can support just about anything that allows people the right to choose but not the stance that if you support it will remove that right, there has to be basic rights we all have.(15)

(15) I am not a Wiccan I just like the phrase, I guess we could also use “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.

Shiny, shiny, shiny toy

Like the steaming great hypocrite that I am I went out and got myself the Fondle Slab MkII. If you have been listening to me for a year I have been resisting this piece of technology with the claims that I prefer my laptop, it didn’t have enough functionality and what could it do that my phone didn’t do.

All of those were valid points and were true at the time, and still true now.

I was however seduced by the sheer experience and shininess of the iPad2, and so was Leigh. Then that was the end of my resistance and I caved in and we got two of them.

Of course, since getting it I have now found many ways to integrate it into my life. I am currently sat in a coffee shop, Ben has a book, Leigh is out shopping and while I wait for her I am writing this. Normally I would be reading on my phone or playing Angry Birds, but now that I have the slab and it is easy to carry about I have an electronic device to write with.

I know that I could use a notebook, my laptop is 17 inch and not easy to carry around for just typing notes, but these days I prefer to type out my thoughts as I have them. I have become used to using the action of my fingers typing on a keyboard to lull my sense of sight and allow my brain to de-focus the world and concentrate on the subject I wish to examine.

But, there is a sense that I am just finding ways to make this expensive, and did I say shiny, toy a valuable part of my life. Though, on the flip side, if it makes me write more and helps me with the organisation of my thoughts and my life then it is already worth the price I paid for it. 

It is also a really nice size for interacting with the web and social media, also nice for watching movies on, and the battery life is just great. So, there is a lot to value in the device. It is never going to replace my laptop, and if I need to do serious work I will pull out that or sit at a desktop where I can be far more productive. It is never going to replace my phone for instant always on convenience and five minute distraction filler in a small item, though the iPad is a very fast and smooth user experience.

It is however yet another tool in my burgeoning gadgetry arsenal. I love my gadgets, I always have, and to be honest using this pad makes me feel like I really am in the future, we may not have the rocket pants but we do have the always on world with a vast storehouse of always-on information, user interaction, the ability to talk or see almost everyone you will ever know and to share your life and experiences to a vast audience. That is e future, and it doesn’t feel anywhere near as stark and unemotional as some sic-fi would have had us believe.

This is how’ve me being euphoric about the new toy I have, in a future piece I may examine the cost of our increasingly connected and observed world and why, one day, grandfather’s bollocks might drive the bus.

Should I tolerate this…?

So I am having a bit of an issue with the bad usage of the word tolerant[1]. It is typically when someone wants to show they are an enlightened and well-rounded individual who perhaps will not accept a certain behaviour. So they state this:

“We must become less tolerant”

Well, no. You’re not becoming less tolerant of something, you are becoming intolerant. The word already exists for you. You may “tolerate” or “not tolerate” there is not a quantifiable state of more than/greater than or less than in tolerance. You either are, or you are not. It is that simple.

Stop trying to sound reasonable as you don’t want to be seen as a bigot, it is fair enough not to want to be seen as a bigot, being intolerant of one thing doesn’t make you so. You have to be intolerant of everything to be a bigot. You are, though, being objectionable, stop using a passive approach to attempt to look like you are not. It isn’t reasonable. It is just wrong to pretend, be a vertebrate and responsible for your attitudes.

Whether it is political, sexual, religious, philosophical or simply not liking someones behaviour it doesn’t matter. You are allowed your opinion and feelings. But don’t claim that it is a lessening of your overall magnanimity, it is an intolerance, not a lowering of your general overall brilliant tolerance.

Some reference to help:

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/tolerate

“tol·er·ate
/ˈtɒləˌreɪt/ Show Spelled[tol-uh-reyt]
–verb (used with object), -at·ed, -at·ing.
1. to allow the existence, presence, practice, or act of without prohibition or hindrance; permit.
2. to endure without repugnance; put up with: I can tolerate laziness, but not incompetence.
3. Medicine/Medical . to endure or resist the action of (a drug, poison, etc.).
4. Obsolete . to experience, undergo, or sustain, as pain or hardship.”

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/intolerant

“in·tol·er·ant
/ɪnˈtɒlərənt/ Show Spelled[in-tol-er-uhnt]
–adjective
1. not tolerating or respecting beliefs, opinions, usages, manners, etc., different from one’s own, as in political or religious matters; bigoted.
2. unable or unwilling to tolerate or endure (usually followed by of ): intolerant of very hot weather.”

 

[1] There is an argument that I am wrong about this being bad usage as there is a culture of, and prior usage of, it in this manner.

So shallow I tweeted it

  • Rants
  • Friday, 8 April 2011
  • 0

I should also have titled this piece: Don’t fight Homophobia (or any other hateful attitude) with simple (or maybe even stupid) statements.

So I read the following statement on Twitter, re-tweeted a number of times, and also said on Facebook and now awarded a platitudinous status:

“‘n’ number of animals who practice homosexuality only one is homophobic, what does that say?”

Well, I will answer that, it says fatuous statements like this do more harm than good as anyone with half a brain can turn that argument against you. In fact for fun, i am going to. These are not even well thought out, but let me give you a few half-arsed knee-jerk reactions.

Simple Biological Response

You did not distinguish between recreational and procreational sex. There are not that many species ‘proven’ to have recreational sexual relationships, although many species are excited by sexual encounters it is a procreational biological reaction. Therefore many of your ‘n’ number of species are practicing homosexuality without any recreational basis, you have just degenarated it to an unthinking biological reaction with no specific need, not a ‘choice’ that a cogent lifeform would make. So what are we now saying? Is it an error of biology? Can we correct that? You see what kind of hateful argument can be brought from this.*

Simple Cognitive Response

If you point at something every animal on the planet will look at the end of the finger that is pointing, only one of them will look where you are pointing. So we can conclude that humans ‘are’ all wired differently, therefore your practice of homosexuality may just be you indulging in an ‘animalistic’ trait, rather than a culturally and socially developed ‘human’ relationship. It is unthinking and not something that an educated and morally responsible species would indulge in. You are being thoughtless, primitive and evolutionally backward in your practices. Again haters have to hate, that argument is a pile of shit but the above statement allows it to be formed.**

Simple Religious Response

“‘n’ number of animals who practice homosexuality only one is homophobic, what does that say?” It says we are better than animals. It says that we have a God who taught us that practice was wrong and those who indulge in it are worse than filthy dogs and should be treated, not in a compassionate way, but in a manner that you would treat a defect in an animal, by breeding it out. Yep. We walked into that didn’t we. We now invite them to be extremely offensive and we supplied them with the means to attack.

The Twitter Effect

I can see the point behind the original statement. I can see why you might want to observe our species to try and understand what makes us so judegmental, whether it is a pack dynamic that lies behind some of the congregating into hate groups; is it identity, are we seeking absolution or affirtmation of our position.

But what I can’t understand is why you think you are changing anything with this statement, or by repeating it. At its best it is mildly provocational, it is not that thoughtful. While it instantly invites the responses I gave above. There is no examination implied. What does it gain? Will a single homophobe, or even people who are not homophobic and just don’t care, be swayed by that statement and say “goodness, I hadn’t thought of that I must instantly stop my beliefs as it offends some people, I shall fly instantly to a GBLT rally and dance with those wonderful queers.”

I guess what I am saying is that you turned a potentially interesting observation that allows us to look and examine our species better and to educate people into a f*cking soundbite for Twitter. Not everything is best said in 140 characters. Sometimes you shouldn’t have the whole a complex argument in a single short sentence.

In other words you have made this a cosmetic argument, and homophobia, the rights of humans to practice whatever they want in a relationship,*** the right to live without fear and opression because of a choice in identity and sexuality are not cosmetic. You might as well have said, “‘n’ number of animals have dirty faces only one wears makeup, what does that say?” It says absolutely nothing. That’s what it says.

Endings and Final Thoughts

This is mostly just another rant against Twitter as I think people sometimes use it badly and this statement used in this way was prime evidence of that. I am not trying to dismiss people who think it is useful to have a stance against oppression. I am not trying to say we shouldn’t all show our support and that when you re-tweeted this that was your aim and now I appear to be implying that is wrong.

I am not…well I am doing that, but not for the reasons of dismissing.

The right to support is not the bad thing, it is the soundbite argument that is bad. The position it takes is so easily overcome it destroys the usefulness of saying it in the first place. It is so easy to find a microblog account and make your argument stronger. Or to use Twitter to link to longer statements, to organisations and websites that can argue these points for us all in a more positive and cogent fashion.

Basically, I think if it is that important, and it is important to you, you should spend a few more words on the subject. If you can change a mind in 140 characters, maybe that mind is not worth changing.

*By the way an easy counter to this offensive argument is those animals that have been seen to have recreational sex “do” practice homosexuality, it still doesn’t prove anything, but it is observed.

**Yes reducing an argument by using an absurd counter argument, no other animal on the planet wears sunglasses or swimming costumes or practices cosmetic surgery either, but again that can be used for or against, both sides can be ridiculous.

***By that I am implying that it is a mutually agreed relationship.

Mark Keating
The Quick View Mark Keating is an odd male with roughly five decades of chronological competence in his girth. He is married to Leigh a girl of great patience and unsurpassed kawaii-ness. They both live in Lancaster, UK, conveniently since they are wed, with their sons, Benjamin, Elliott and Asher. They are terrorised by a cat called Darwin and various tropical fresh-water fish.